Nerd Fight: Battle #38

It’s that time again. To reiterate, every Friday the Cupcake Rogues will randomly pick 2 characters to do battle – whether it be Marvel, DC, female, male, mutant, human, or human that pretends to be a mutant with magic (I’m looking at you, Juggernaut), they are all possible. Once we’ve randomly selected our two, they will go head to head in several categories with one being deemed winner. The winner will live on to fight another day, but a warning – with 200 possible characters, it may be awhile before round 2 🙂

Thirty-eighth week in the random selection:

Silver Surfer vs. Lobo

Silver Surfer Lobo
Origin Norrin Radd was born on the planet Zenn-La. Radd and his family were part of an ancient advanced civilization that lost the will to strive or explore, leaving Norrin restless and yearning for something more. Faced with the destruction of his world by Galactus, Radd makes a deal with him. Radd pledges to serve Galactus and seek out planets for him to feed on in exchange for his lover, Shalla-Bal’s safety. Galactus accepts this offer, giving Radd a portion of the Power Cosmic, which turns him into the Silver Surfer.  Once Radd runs out of uninhabited planets for Galactus to feast on, he leads Galactus to Earth. Here the Surfer meets the Fantastic Four and Alicia Masters. Touched by their kindness, he chooses to rebel against Galactus and drives him off. As punishment, Galactus exiles the Surfer to Earth, creating an invisible barrier that only effects him. There once was a beautiful planet named Czarnia. The people living there enjoyed peace and tranquility until the day Lobo was born. In Lobo’s first hours of birth he bit the fingers off the midwife who delivered him, frightened a nurse to death and attacked hospital staff with scalpels. The baby was named Lobo – Meaning “He Who Devours Your Entrails and Thoroughly Enjoys it.” Things only get stranger from here. The people had lived a life of pacifism so long that they simply didn’t know how to handle him. By the time he was in grade school, Lobo ruled the roost. He killed a teacher for calling him a mean little bastard and ripped the throat out of his principal. By the time Lobo was high school age he decided he’d had enough of the simpering Czarnians and set to work on creating a disease to wipe them all out. He succeeded and for 5 days straight, Lobo watched his people drop like flies around him. When it was all over he drank a toast to himself and decided he would become a bounty hunter.
Edge? Lobo – Any guy whose birth could easily be his WTF moment has an original origin.
Powers/ Abilities The Silver Surfer wields the Power Cosmic, which grants him superhuman strength, stamina, durability, senses and the ability to absorb and manipulate the universe’s ambient energy for a variety of effects. He can navigate through interstellar space, dimensions, and can exceed the speed of light when on his board. He is also capable of time travel. The Surfer concerts matter into energy, making food, water, air, and sleep unnecessary. However, he does enter a sleep-like meditation occasionally to dream. He can project energy in various forms, including force fields and bolts of cosmic force powerful enough to destroy entire planets or create black holes.  The Surfer can heal living organisms and has proven capable of revitalizing and evolving organic life on a planet-wide scale. He can alter the size of himself or other matter, cast illusions, and phase through solid matter. The Surfer can even see through time, allowing him a limited perception of past and future events and giving him telepathic abilities, including mind-reading an influence over human emotion. The Surfer’s board is linked to the Surfer and responds to his mental commands even when he’s not in contact with it. Though the board is nearly indestructible, the Surfer can repair or recreate it is necessary. The board is also capable of absorbing and imprisoning other beings. The limits of Lobo’s strength and durability are often left up to the writers’ interpretation. However, he’s gone toe-to-toe with the Man of Steel and lived to tell the tale. He can also survive massive explosions without sustaining injury as well as survive in deep space. Lobo has a healing factor that allows him to regenerate himself from just a drop of his own blood. Although he’s essentially immortal because neither Heaven or Hell will come to collect him. Lobo is a nearly unparalled bounty hunter and tracks his victims through his sense of smell, which is apparently powerful enough to track through the vacuum of space. He’s excellent at armed and unarmed combat and prefers to fight with a massive gutting hook attached to a chain which he keeps wrapped around his wrist. Though he comes across as a great big lout, he’s smart enough to whip up virulent agents and their antidotes and he made his “Space Hog” into a time machine with spare parts he’s scavenged. Lobo was recently granted a red lantern ring of rage by Atrocitus.
Edge? Silver Surfer – This is a close one, but when it comes down to it, the Surfer has the edge of consistently awesome powers on a large scale. This would probably end up with Silver Surfer throwing Lobo into a Black Hole and Lobo terrorizing a whole new galaxy.
Love Interest Shalla-Bal, his love-interest from his home planet, whom he became the Silver Surfer to save. While exiled on Earth, he sees her several times again, but always with her being held as a pawn by his enemies, and every time he’s required to let her go to save Earth. When his exile is finally lifted, Radd returns to Zenn-La to find Shalla-Bal is now the empress and unable to renew their romance. What’s worse? She’s married to Radd’s long lost half-brother. He later has flings with Mantis and Nova, but they both end badly. He also at one point has a weird love triangle with Alicia Masters and The Thing. Lobo flirts with Darlene, the only waitress at a diner he frequents. Though he’s caused the destruction of said diner several times, he usually tries to protect Darlene (and Al the owner) from harm.
Edge? Silver Surfer – Because anything is more impressive than trying to bang the bartender at your local watering hole.
Costume The Silver Surfer is, you guessed it, silver. He doesn’t wear clothes, he just perches his silver ass on that silver surfboard and calls it a day. Lots of leather and chains. If Hell’s Angels had a deity, it would be this guy.
Edge? Lobo – Silver Surfer is basically naked, yes?
Most Entertaining Personality While the Silver Surfer has an innate nobility and is depicted as a semi-divine being, when he first is exiled to Earth he lacks the most basic knowledge of good versus evil. On Earth he begins to learn things like jealousy, despair, and cruelty. Even after seeing humanity’s dark side so often, Radd fights on the side of good. No one in the DC Universe loves violence more than Lobo. He’s an arrogant, rude, brute of a guy who drinks too much and smokes nasty cigars. He is willing to kill ANYONE if the price is right. On the flip side, Lobo also has a rather strict sense of honor – “The Main Man’s word is his bond”. He also seems to have a love for space dolphins. Once, while fighting Aquaman, he gave up the fight when he found out Aquaman was raised by dolphins.
Edge? Lobo – We could watch that train wreck all day!
Best story arc In the Annihilation story arc, the Silver Surfer joins Galactus’ other heralds against the forces of the Annihilation Wave and becomes Galactus’ herald once more to help save the universe from Annihilus and two beings named “Tenebrous, of the Darkness Between” and “Aegis, Lady of All Sorrows.” The heralds defeat and capture the duo, giving them to Annihilus and Thanos for experimentation. Thanos learns of Annihilus’ more personal goal and is soon killed by Drax the Destroyer. Learning of Thanos’ death and Annihilus’ plan, the Silver Surfer frees Galactus, and a pissed off Galactus destroys more than half of the Annihilation Wave, while a group called the United Front defeat Annihilus himself. The Silver Surfer tracks down Tenebrous and Aegis and maneuvers them into The Crunch – an all-destroying border of the universe. After this he returns to his role as Galactus’ herald. Without a doubt it’s the Paramilitary Christmas Special. Lobo is contacted by a drunken Easter Bunny who takes a hit out on Santa Claus for stealing most of the glory from lesser holiday icons. Lobo is happy to accept and heads to the North Pole where he mercilessly slays all of Santa’s elves. When he takes on Santa himself it’s to find out that Santa is not the jolly man most people believe him to be, but a dictator. After a vicious battle ending with Lobo decapitating Santa with one of his own shivs, Lobo packs up and leaves – But not before shooting Rudolph in the head. I giggled the entire time I wrote this. Mwhahhahahahahaha!
Edge? Lobo – w….t….f????
Hotness If you like to look at your own reflection when you look into your man’s eyes (I’m looking at YOU, Emma Frost), then sign up for some Silver Surfer lovin’. He’s got pasty skin, pupiless red eyes and black and gray dreadlocks. Picture a roided up Gene Simmons dressed in biker gear. Ladies?
Edge? Silver Surfer – We… don’t really feel we need to explain here.
Fiercest foe Galactus. Although the two eventually come to a truce and even work together again, Galactus is the reason Radd had to become the Silver Surfer in the first place. Which is why he lost his love and his planet and is doomed to wander the galaxies. Rude. Wolverine fans. During a Marvel Vs. DC crossover, fans were invited to vote to choose the outcome of a battle between Wolverine and Lobo. Wolvie kicked Lobo’s ass.
Edge? Silver Surfer – Galactus really ruined the Surfer’s life. Aaaaand, Lobo’s fans don’t strike us as the voting type anyway.
Biggest WTF Moment Norrin discovers that Galactus has tampered with his mind at one point and reveals part of his past, including the fact that he saw his mother’s dead body after she slit her wrists and that his father, a scientist, was accused of plagiarizing and shot himself because of Norrin’s disappointment. Ummm, probably should’ve let Galactus keep those a secret. Pretty much everything Lobo is involved in is a wtf moment. He’s been transformed into a teenager and joined young justice. He’s claimed to have found religion but quickly renounced it when a triple headed fish god let him out of his promise. His own rage powered an entire sector of Hell. He’s killed his school teacher, his people, his bastard children and Santa Claus. The list goes on and on.
Edge? Lobo … Just, Lobo.
Person who should attempt an on-screen portrayal Doug Jones was the body of the Silver Surfer, while Laurence Fishburne did his voice in Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer. Doug Jones is always a good bet when you’re working with a character that needs a lot of CGI work/heavy make up (just as he did in Hellboy, Pan’s Labyrinth, Legion, etc.). In The Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special, Lobo is played by Andrew Bryniarski, and even though it looks like it cost $17 to produce, it is AWESOME. (Thanks, Tim!)
Edge? Lobo – no offense to Doug Jones, but we’d rather watch the Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special on loop than have to watch 10 minutes of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

Silver Surfer: 4

Lobo:  6

And the winner is…. LOBO! He’s our kind of people, what can we say? Silver Surfer is a bit too vanilla and we like our sundaes with a few nuts thrown in… ZING!


5 Responses to “Nerd Fight: Battle #38”

  1. 1 Saint
    December 31, 2010 at 11:22 am

    Deadpool Vs Lobo: DEADPOOL WINS!!!!!!!!!

  2. 3 kingofspadez
    January 1, 2011 at 12:35 am

    Does the Silver Surfer have Nuts!

  3. 4 Saint
    January 3, 2011 at 10:52 am

    I know you ladies don’t take requests but if you ever feel the need to I’d like to see The Darkness vs Spawn

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